Zach sits down with Noam Markose, a marketer, dad of four, and active IDF reservist living in Jerusalem. Noam walks through what happened to his family starting October 7th, when a siren interrupted a Jewish holiday and he was called up for what turned into roughly seven months of on-and-off reserve duty on Israel's northern border. He describes being "torn apart" from his wife and kids with about 12 hours to process before packing a bag for an unknown length of time, and how his wife built the routine that held the household together. The conversation lands on the shared, universal parts of fatherhood: stepping up when you're called, the difficulty of leaving and re-entering a family's rhythm, and celebrating each kid for who they actually are. Noam closes with the reminder that every kid is different and that more is caught than taught — his son watched him step up and lead.
Noam repeatedly credits his wife as "the hero" for maintaining routine and sanity with four kids (plus two nephews for a stretch) while he was gone.
His wife "developed this muscle of doing it all by herself," and by the second call-up the whole family knew what to expect, which softened the blow.
Even with 12 free hours and a base only ~90 minutes away, coming home was often "more harmful and more disruptive to her and to the routine," so he stayed.
The coming-back and leaving-again cycle got worse over time — kids crying, a daughter asking "when is dad coming back to visit?"
Celebrate them for who they are instead of forcing your passions on them.
Noam's son watched his dad step up to lead and protect the family — and separately came to share interests (NFL on Sunday nights) on his own, without being pushed.
The wives at home are the heroes of the country holding the routine, maintaining sanity with the kids. That was huge.
Name the "homefront hero" in your own house out loud — tell your spouse specifically what they carry when you're gone or heads-down at work.
Before your next stretch of travel or long hours, help your spouse pre-build the routine (schedule, backup help from family/community) instead of expecting to fill gaps yourself.
Audit whether your "quick check-ins" during busy seasons actually help or disrupt the household rhythm — ask your spouse honestly.
Pick one interest your kid has that's NOT yours, and go all-in on learning it with them this month.
Stop forcing one of your passions on a kid who's shown they don't love it; put your interests out there and let what rubs off, rub off.
Practical skills, real stories, and one thing to actually do this week with your family. Written by a dad in the trenches, not a marketing department.
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