Zach sits down with Eli Matteson, a 26-year-old barber and dad of three (with a third baby due any day), in what may be the show's first video episode. Eli is one of the listeners who reached out after the podcast, and his story covers being a young dad with three kids under three, choosing family time over high-paying-but-all-consuming jobs, and the hard road through a miscarriage that pushed him toward drinking and blaming his wife before an honest reckoning pulled him out. His core fatherhood advice is simple and concrete: be present ("don't just be in the room, be the room"), be selfless, and protect your "you time" so you don't become the angry, resentful dad. It's an honest, ground-level conversation about exhaustion, faith, and showing up for your kids even when you're worn out.
"Don't just be in the room, be the room." Kids don't care what's on the TV — they care whether you're on the floor with them.
Giving up all of your own renewal makes you the resentful, angry dad. Protecting one night for yourself is an investment in your family, not selfishness.
Eli walked away from high-paying overtime work (151 hours in two weeks) because never seeing his pregnant wife made having a family pointless.
Following a miscarriage, Eli realized he was silently blaming his wife. Naming it, apologizing, and grieving together pulled him out.
Toxic, yelling work environments taught Eli exactly how he does NOT want to communicate with his kids — get down on their level instead of yelling down at them.
After forgetting his son for 40 minutes, Eli changed his routine (laying out clothes the night before) to free up time for his family.
Don't just be in the room, be the room.
Get on the floor and play with your kids tonight — fully present, phone down, no "one second" stalling.
Pick one recurring night (weekly or monthly) for guaranteed "you time" and put it on the calendar with your spouse's buy-in.
Lay out your clothes the night before to reclaim morning minutes for your kids instead of getting ready.
If you've experienced a miscarriage, have the honest conversation with your wife — name any blame you're carrying and grieve it together.
If you're struggling after a loss, take your wife on a date, then find one dad who's been through it and talk to him.
Practical skills, real stories, and one thing to actually do this week with your family. Written by a dad in the trenches, not a marketing department.
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